Reflection - The Art of Just Being
I bang on about being present a lot.
Probably more than people realise.
But learning to just has become a huge part of my life.
For a long time, I was always thinking ahead, planning, anticipating, fixing, managing symptoms and trying to keep everything together.
Even when I was sitting still, my mind wasn't.
I've had to learn that being still isn't being lazy.
Doing nothing isn't wasting time.
Sometimes stopping is exactly what I need.
Learning to stop
Being present sounds simple.
Stop.
Breathe.
Listen.
Look around.
But actually doing it takes practice.
I've had to teach myself to come back to where I am instead of constantly living in what has happened or worrying about what might happen next.
To notice my feet on the ground.
The sun on my face.
The birds.
The breeze through the trees.
To sit with a coffee and actually enjoy it instead of mentally running through everything else I should be doing.
These ordinary moments have become some of my favourite moments.
Remember when we were kids?
Recently, me and my bestie showing him how to just be in the moment.
It took me straight back to being a kid.
Remember lying on the grass watching the clouds?
A cloud wasn't just a cloud.
It was a dragon, a dog, a face, a spaceship whatever your imagination decided that day.
There was no purpose.
No productivity.
No rushing.
You were simply there.
So we started looking at the trees.
And suddenly, they weren't just trees either. 😂
One looked like it was about to chase us.
One looked like it could absolutely whooping some ass.
One looked like an octopus.
Another looked like some creepy troll.
And we laughed.
Properly laughed.
For a moment, nothing else mattered.
The uncomfortable part of slowing down
Nobody really talks about how strange slowing down can feel when you're used to constantly doing.
When everything gets quiet, you hear yourself.
The thoughts.
The worries.
The feelings you've been pushing aside.
I've had to learn that not everything needs fixing.
Not every thought needs an answer.
Sometimes I can simply notice what's happening, breathe, and let the moment pass without turning it into another problem to solve.
That has been a big lesson for me.
I don't have to fix everything today.
Stop waiting for life to begin
It's easy to live in anticipation.
Waiting to feel better.
Waiting for the next appointment.
Waiting for more energy.
Waiting for life to become easier.
But if I'm always waiting for the next thing, I miss the thing happening right now.
And this moment is still my life.
A bird landing nearby.
The warmth of the sun.
A cup of coffee.
A good conversation.
The ocean.
A ridiculous-looking tree.
A laugh.
These are the moments I want to notice now.
Not because everything is perfect.
Because it isn't.
But because life is more than the hard days.
Maybe I don't need to become someone new
I used to think healing meant becoming stronger, better, different.
Now I think some of it is remembering.
Remembering the little girl who could lie on the grass for hours.
Who could turn clouds into characters.
Who could find something fascinating in an ordinary tree.
Who didn't need to achieve anything to enjoy being alive.
Maybe I don't need to become someone completely new.
Maybe I just need to keep finding my way back to the parts of me that got lost along the way.
So I'm learning to slow down.
Look properly.
Listen.
Breathe.
Laugh at ridiculous trees.
Let a moment be enough.
Because sometimes the most powerful thing we can do isn't another big transformation.
It's simply stopping long enough to realise…
we're already here.
And maybe, for this moment,
that's enough.
