Blog Series - How Years of Survival Affected Your Body
Sometimes we understand our story long before we understand what survival did to our body.
Use this checklist as a gentle reflection tool. You don't need to relate to everything, and checking something doesn't mean there is something "wrong" with you. It may simply help you recognise patterns your body developed while trying to keep you safe.
Always Being on Alert
I constantly scan my surroundings for potential danger.
I find it difficult to fully relax, even when I know I'm safe.
I automatically notice changes in people's moods, voices or behaviour.
I often feel like something bad is about to happen.
I struggle to let my guard down around other people.
Nervous System & Survival Responses
I experience fight, flight, freeze or fawn responses.
My body reacts before my mind has had time to process what is happening.
Small things can sometimes trigger a much bigger physical response.
I struggle to calm myself after becoming overwhelmed.
I can feel "wired" even when I'm physically exhausted.
Chronic Tension & Bracing
I regularly clench my jaw or grind my teeth.
I carry tension in my shoulders, neck or back.
My muscles feel like they're constantly bracing.
I hold tension in my stomach or pelvic area.
I catch myself holding my breath.
Exhaustion & Sleep
I feel exhausted even after resting.
I struggle to fall asleep because my mind or body won't switch off.
I wake frequently during the night.
I wake feeling like I haven't truly rested.
I experience periods where my body seems to completely crash.
Digestive & Body Changes
Stress affects my stomach or digestion.
My appetite changes when I'm stressed or overwhelmed.
I notice physical symptoms increasing during stressful periods.
My body feels more sensitive to pain or physical sensations.
I sometimes struggle to understand why my body is reacting the way it is.
Disconnecting From Your Body
I sometimes feel disconnected from my body.
I find it difficult to identify what I'm feeling physically.
I learned to ignore pain, exhaustion or discomfort to keep going.
Being still or quiet can make me uncomfortable.
Reconnecting with my body sometimes feels unfamiliar or overwhelming.
Difficulty Feeling Safe
Peace or calm can feel strangely uncomfortable.
I feel guilty when I'm resting.
I feel like I always need to be doing something.
I struggle to believe that good moments will last.
Part of me is always preparing for the next problem.
Breathing & Bracing
I take shallow breaths without noticing.
I hold my breath when I'm anxious or concentrating.
I clench my body when something feels uncertain.
I automatically prepare myself for something to go wrong.
I find deep relaxation difficult.
When Your Body Remembers
My mind knows I'm safe, but my body doesn't always believe it.
Certain situations create physical reactions before I understand why.
I experience reactions that seem connected to past experiences.
I sometimes feel like my body is responding to an old threat.
I am learning that these responses may have once helped me survive.
What Did Survival Teach Your Body?
Take a moment and finish these sentences:
Survival taught my body to:
I learned to ignore:
I learned to brace for:
I find it hardest to relax when:
My body still expects:
Something I am learning to unlearn is:
Something I want my body to know now is:
Remember
You can leave survival behind physically before you have learned how to live beyond it emotionally.
Healing isn't simply telling yourself:
"I'm safe now."
It's slowly and repeatedly teaching your body:
I don't have to be on guard anymore.
I don't have to brace for impact.
I don't have to earn rest.
I am allowed to feel.
I am allowed to take up space.
I am allowed to slow down.
I am allowed to receive care.
I am allowed to live, not just survive.
Reflection Question
What did survival teach your body to do that you are now having to unlearn?
There is no right answer.
Sometimes recognising what your body has been doing for years is the beginning of learning how to give it something different.