My Healing Journey so far

My healing journey. It's been quite a ride, and one of the hardest things i done here is what i noticed the things that nobody really talks about.

First, let me tell you about this weird internal battle I experienced. It's like having two versions of yourself fighting for control. The old you, comfortable with familiar patterns, even if they're unhealthy, constantly wrestles with the new you who's trying to grow. Some days, I'd catch myself slipping back into old habits, then feel frustrated because I knew better now. It's like teaching yourself to write with your other hand - awkward, challenging, but possible.

Then there's the loneliness. Oh man, the loneliness. Nobody prepares you for how isolating healing can be. There were nights when I'd make progress, have these huge breakthrough moments, but had no one to share them with who really understood. It's like climbing a mountain in the dark - you're doing all this hard work, but sometimes it feels like you're the only one on that path.

Here's something that really caught me off guard: people really struggle with the new version of you. Friends, family - even the ones who said they wanted you to get better - sometimes they're the ones who fight your changes the hardest. They're used to the old you, the one who always said yes, the one who took their jokes, the one who played small. When you start setting boundaries and speaking your truth, it rocks their world.

And yes, this leads to one of the hardest parts - having to leave people behind. Some relationships just don't survive your healing journey. It's like outgrowing a favorite old jacket - it might hold precious memories, but it no longer fits who you're becoming. I had to learn that it's okay to let go, even when it hurts.

But here's the beautiful part - life becomes calmer. It's like after a storm when everything is quiet and clear. You start attracting people who appreciate your growth, who encourage your boundaries, who celebrate your authenticity. Your mind becomes less chaotic, your decisions more aligned with your values. You stop constantly seeking external validation because you finally understand your own worth.

Looking back now, I realize that healing isn't just about fixing what's broken - it's about becoming who you were always meant to be. Yes, it's messy and complicated, but it's also the most worthwhile journey you'll ever take. Remember, if you're in the middle of your own healing journey right now, what you're feeling is normal, and you're not alone, even when it feels like you are.