August Reflection

August felt like I was adrift in a small boat, endlessly circling in the ocean, searching for a sign to guide me. In healing, there comes a moment where you must choose: leap into the unknown or retreat into the familiar. I’ve faced this crossroad before, but this time, I chose the plunge.

So here I am, navigating life in circles, unsure of direction yet beginning to wonder if perhaps that’s the lesson to embrace the journey itself. Maybe life is teaching me to pause, to listen to my own needs, to honor quiet days, and to accept that discovering who I am in this chapter is as important as where I’m headed. I’m also learning to reflect on who deserves to walk beside me as I travel forward.

August highlighted how exhausted I truly am physically, mentally, and emotionally. These past four years especially have been some of the hardest, filled with battles to access the right systems of support. Too often I’ve been left to figure things out alone, despite all the evidence and conversations I’ve brought forward. It’s disheartening to realize how many hoops you still have to jump through just to get the basics in place for recovery.

And yet, amidst this struggle, August gave me clarity. I’ve changed. People have left, solitude has become familiar, and my tolerance for unhealthy behaviors has diminished. I see now that life has shifted I must rest more, do less, and give my body permission to heal.

Perhaps September will be different. With Reiki 2 started, my birthday, precious time with my grandson, his birthday, and a retreat, maybe this is the month where I no longer drift in circles but finally catch the current that carries me toward my direction.